Dust to Dust

So I was thinking one day, “What songs would I want played at my funeral?”

Morbid? Maybe a little. It’s never too early to think about, though. And death fascinates me. Not in the creepy obsessive way (or worse), but in the introspective, thought-provoking way.

As in, “What really happens?”

Well I’ll only know once it happens and, sorry to say, I probably won’t be able to tell y’all. You’ll just have to find out for yourself.

I only have a few requests for my funeral:
1. Give all my serviceable organs to those who truly need them. They may be few and far between but I know somebody can use something of mine.
2. Make it as cheap as possible. Which most likely means cremation. Seriously, my body will be dead. Gone. What’s more morbid than keeping that around?
3. Laugh, damnit! And have a feast. I’ll leave my recipe book.
4. Only those who want to be there should be there. No guilting anybody into going. No forcing someone to go. That’s even more morbid than thinking about your own funeral songs.
5. Play these songs:

Louis Armstrong “What a Wonderful World”

Marvin Sapp “In The Garden”

Nat King Cole “Stardust”

And of course, this timeless classic:

I’ll have you know that the phrase “another one bites the dust” is actually taken from the Bible. You don’t believe me? Check out Psalm 72:9 – They that dwell in the wilderness shall bow before him; and his enemies shall lick the dust.

Just please do me a favor and don’t play the video of Freddie Mercury prancing around in his underpants. The song is good. The video is not. Not the last image I want people to remember me by.

However, this is something to remember me by:

That’s right, fill your hands, you sons of bitches! Then lick my dust and kiss my ash.

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One thought on “Dust to Dust

  1. I’m still giggling. I always appreciate humor around death. I love the part when you said you would leave your cook book!

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